Election season has rolled in like flu season and the Left has been shouting from the rooftops that the future of the country is at stake. For once, they might be right about something. We certainly have been a “sick” country ever since Biden and Kamala started ruling over us. That’s why, it’s time to get off the couch, shake off the apathy and the disease of the Democratic Party, and cast your vote early for the Orange Man. Here’s why…
Weather.
Weather can be unpredictable. Imagine getting ready to vote on Election Day only to find that the skies have opened up with a monsoon just to spite you. Think of what has been happening down in the southeastern part of the country with the hurricanes and all of the flooding.
There are many voters in North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, Georgia, Florida and Georgia who are displaced, have no voting centers left standing and there are folks who have sadly perished. Early voting is your insurance against any last-minute storm cooked up by Mother Nature or, who knows, some “climate manipulation” from the other side (who knows what the Dems, Chinese or Russians are able to do these days).
Cyberattacks, computer issues and electricity.
Let’s face it. Some of the elderly election volunteers who show up to check you in and run the voting systems (at least where I live) don’t exactly strike me as tech gurus. So what happens if there is a computer problem they can’t figure out? What about an outside force that is able to shut down their laptops with a virus or do some other kind of damage to their computers?
In today’s digital age, cyber attacks are a reality, and you never know when they might hit. A well-timed internet outage, electrical outage or glitch could conveniently take down your polling station’s system. Don’t let those pesky cyber gremlins get the best of you – secure your vote early before they start playing their games.
Instability from the Leftists.
What if there’s a school shooting, an attack on Iran by Israel, or a police incident that the Democrats label as racially motivated? In such scenarios, we could see an eruption of Leftist protests flooding the streets, leading to chaos and disruptions. Imagine them blocking roads, obstructing your path to the polls, and making it harder for you to exercise your right to vote in peace unless they deem you “worthy” of passage.
Ballot shortages and long lines.
Imagine this: you’re all set to cast your vote, and when you finally get to the polling place, they run out of ballots. It might sound far-fetched, but it’s happened before. Higher-than-expected voter turnout has been known to leave polling places scrambling to provide enough ballots for everyone. And in today’s charged political climate, who knows what surprises we could see?
High voter turnout could also mean longer lines – and folks who have to get home to their kids or have appointments will be forced to leave and not cast a vote. And what about long lines in traffic? What if your regular sucky commute, a highway accident or road construction forces you to miss the deadline to vote – or to be too tired or ticked off enough that you don’t want to bother to vote?
Not to be macabre, but life happens – and doesn’t.
Things don’t always go as planned, and life’s surprises can come at you fast – car trouble, illness, or your dog suddenly deciding to eat something it shouldn’t. Not to mention the approximately 5,775 voting-age individuals who die in the United States on any given day. Don’t gamble on making it to the polls on the one day that matters most. Bank your vote early, and breathe easy knowing you’ve done your part for Trump, the Constitution, democracy and for MAGA.
Aliens – real ones.
Is Area 51 real? Are those reported sightings of alien spacecraft zooming through the skies just the imagination of Navy pilots – or something more? With the stakes sky-high this November, maybe now is the perfect moment for the Democrats to call in any extraterrestrial allies they might have to help them win the election for Kamala. Imagine it: aliens setting up camp in your neighborhood or parking their spaceships in your driveway. Would you really risk a close encounter just to cast a vote? Then again, for Trump, you just might, eh? After all, he told you to “Fight! Fight! Fight!”
Live long and prosper, my friends.