Florida Man Calls Police To Test His Meth’s Authenticity
Thomas Colucci called police after suspecting that the meth he purchased was illegitimate. He told them he was an experienced drug user and that something felt off about the product. Colucci wanted police to test the meth so he could tell people if the dealer was on the level. It was real meth, and he went to real jail.

Best of Florida Man 2023 (So Far)
Florida Man Calls 911 To Get Help Moving Stolen Stuff
A couple was arrested after calling the police to get help moving some heavy items out of a house they were burglarizing. They also wanted a ride to the airport.

Best of Florida Man All Time
Florida Man Calls 911 for Ride to Hooters
He told the police his grandmother had suffered a stroke on the premises and that he needed to get there fast. He even offered to pay for the ride. Police found his grandmother at home, not having a stroke.

Florida Man Charged With Eating Evidence in Court
A judge asked Richard Masten to hand over a piece of paper from an informant about a drug dealer. The tipster’s name was on the paper, so Richard ate the paper to protect their identity. He was found in contempt of court and imprisoned for two weeks.

Florida Man Crashes Into Strip Mall Trying to Time Travel
A Pensacola man drove his Dodge Challenger into a building while trying to get up to speed to time travel like in Back to the Future. The man was unharmed.

Florida Man Trapped in Unlocked Closet for Two Days
John Arwood thought he was trapped in a janitor’s closet at Daytona State College until he realized he could open the door.

Florida Man Believes Wrestling Event Is Haunted by the Ghost of Macho Man Randy Savage
Not much to be said.

Florida Man Insists Syringes Found in His Rectum Aren’t His
Wesley Scott was undergoing a prison strip search when the contraband was found.

Florida Man Calls 911 After Kitten Denied Entry to Strip Club
Surprise, surprise, he was drunk. Police came and got him a cab home.

Florida Man With No Arms or Legs Is Armed and on the Run
The man was wanted in connection with a double murder. Police said running him down was a handful.

Florida Man Once Arrested for Fighting Drag Queen With Tiki Torch Runs for Mayor
Boyd Corbin beat a drag queen with a tiki torch while wearing KKK robes at a Halloween party. He maintained that he acted in self-defense but still found himself in criminal court facing a charge of felony aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. Corbin felt a corrupt system wrongfully prosecuted him, so he ran for mayor on a reform platform.

Florida Man Hid Legless, Fugitive, Girlfriend in Plastic Tote Bin
Police wanted Krystle Anderson after failing to appear in court for using a BB gun to take hostages at a Burger King. When authorities arrived at her boyfriend’s home, they found her hidden in a plastic tote box. As they say, the couple that aids and abets together stays together—once they get out of prison.

Nick Treglia is a Steve Gruber Show Contributor.