You might have heard that NYC has a rat problem. No, not just the politicians. I’m talking about REAL rats. The small, ugly, four-legged kind that scurry around in the dark looking for cheese pizza.
There have been many reasons given for the overabundance of rats in NYC including sidewalk dining outside of restaurants which became more popular (and sometimes necessary) at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. Others cite the city’s rules for placing trash bags on curbs.
So now the City is looking for a person with a “swashbuckling attitude” and a “general aura of badassery” to get the rats under control. The city’s sanitation department says the rat population has jumped 71% over the past two years.
Mayor Eric Adams tweeted the job posting last week and said, “There’s NOTHING I hate more than rats.”
Really? Nothing? Not Republicans? Not Donald Trump? Not even an evening without a party to go to? WOW.
Adams told his city residents, “If you have the drive, determination, and killer instinct needed to fight New York City’s relentless rat population – then your dream job awaits.”
Qualifications? You gotta live in NYC, have a bachelor’s degree (WTF??) and be willing to perform “Catch and Kill” functions using hands-on techniques to exterminate the dirty little rodents. The City would also like someone with experience in urban planning.
The true title for the job is “Director of Rodent Mitigation” and the candidate chosen will report to the Deputy Major for Operations. The job is listed as a 24/7 job so I’m assuming that it’s an on-call type of emergency situation.
The posting says, “The ideal candidate to be highly motivated and somewhat bloodthirsty, determined to look at all solutions from various angles, including improving operational efficiency, data collection, technology innovation, trash management, and wholesale slaughter.”
Key leadership responsibilities include developing a strategy, project management, decisive leadership, public engagement, researching, writing, analysis and killing the rats. In addition to all of that, proficiency in Microsoft Word, Excel and Powerpoint is needed.
A Jack (or Jennifer) of all trades, it appears.
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